So I’m hoping the quote is true, that absence does indeed make the heart fonder; or was it absinth?  Anyhoo clearly I’ve been absent, which is really really poor blogging on my part. My responsibility to my readers has clearly been lacking. But I promise to make it up to you with post after possibly nonsensical post until you may wish for me to be absent again I have recently purchased a home and moved to a new state. Now new state isn’t too far from old state but still required weeks of moving back and forth and back and forth. I’ve told my Fiance that if he wants me to move again he might as well shoot me and bury me in the backyard. I’ll be quite happy there I assure you. Picture of the house can be found at the bottom of this post!

It doesn’t matter if you’re a WAHM, SAHM, WOHM or something in between, you know and understand the pitfalls of being a multi-tasker. As mothers we are life givers, boo boo kissers, checkbook balancers etc etc. I have read several studies showing that moms should make hundreds of thousands of dollars per year for all the jobs we multi-task on a daily basis. Today though I’m talking about what happens when you multi-task too much. Have you ever put Desitin on your toothbrush instead of toothpaste b/c you were balancing baby on your hip and trying to pour milk in your toddler’s cereal? Or how about feeding your kid the dog’s breakfast and vice versa? What about making lists in your mind only to finally find a piece of paper and a pen and not remember one thing you were going to write down? I have a new explanation for what people call “Mommy Brain.” It isn’t that our brains were damaged during our child’s descent down the birth canal but rather we now multi-task so much and so much of the time that we begin to feel just a bit crazy. Ok maybe a lot crazy. The pace of life has increased so much since the time our parent’s were kids. My mother is always telling me, “You need to slow down, give something up, stay home today.” And while she’s telling me these things all I’m thinking is, “Is the stove off? Did I let the dog back in? Did I even PUT a diaper on the baby? Where are my keys? Where are my glasses? I’m five minutes late to my playdate….why am I the one who is ALWAYS late?” And that is NO exaggeration.  My brain is going a mile a minute even when I’m sleeping. BUT I choose to live this way. My son is 3 years old and he takes Karate three times per week, Gymnastics once per week, and Art class once per week. Now I don’t feel obligated to fill my son’s schedule, I do it b/c I LOVE spending time with him “doing” stuff. It’s my thing; It’s what I’m good at. So while my mom says slow down, I take a deep breath, drink some more coffee, and hit “enroll now” in the next session of swim lessons b/c I enjoy this rough and tumble life. I learned from the best. My favorite saying to my own mother has become my son’s favorite saying, “Mommy what are we going to do today?” Motherhood is never boring and yet it’s frighteningly exhausting and it teaches us that while some people laud our multi-tasking skills, we know the real truth, it’s what makes us crazy in the first place!

 

And on that note I leave you with this photo. I spent hours outside today shoveling snow. No I wasn’t shoveling anywhere useful, I was shoveling tracks for my son to race his cars in. Yup it was a good day.

Check out this post that I wrote for the Dayspring blog (in)courage!

http://www.incourage.me/2012/01/the-winning-side.html#comments

“The Friendly Beasts”

At this time of year, I enjoy singing “The Friendly Beasts” to my kids at bedtime.  For one thing, it’s a kid-friendly song.  But it also makes a great lullaby.  Sweet baby Jesus in the manger.  The kind animals all gathered round, happy and proud to give him their gifts.

I remember singing this song to my daughter during colicky nights in our small apartment during seminary, hoping that the soothing lyrics and sweet melody would calm her screams.  Now she is celebrating her third Christmas, and while I still sing it to her, I have mostly been singing it to my 11-month-old son as I rock him before bedtime.

Tonight, as I put him to bed, I started singing it yet again, but for the first time I found myself actually thinking about the words.  About the deeper meaning behind the song.

Let me stop here for a moment and say that today was a particularly hard day.  After coming home after being out, I walked into the house to find the usual clutter of life with two toddlers – kitchen cupboards emptied, toys strewn everywhere.  Later in the day, my daughter threw up on me.  This must have given the dog ideas because later on she threw up on the carpet.  Then there was a particularly nasty case of diaper rash.  On top of all this, we found out our car was going to need some expensive repairs.

So, as I rocked my son in the darkened room, I stopped for a moment to actually listen to the words I was singing.  I’ll admit it.  I needed some encouragement and I was searching for it in this familiar children’s carol.

There went the donkey – carrying Jesus’ mother up the hill to Bethlehem.  Then the cow, who offered baby Jesus his manger for a bed and some hay as a pillow.  The sheep came next, giving up his wool so that Jesus would be warm on Christmas night.  And lastly, the dove, who sang Jesus to sleep on his first night in this world.

Do you see it?

These seemingly simple gifts are really not simple at all.  Not when you think about the sacrifice involved.

Just like the donkey, we are sometimes called to physically bear heavy burdens.  We help a neighbor move furniture, we carry children up and down the stairs, or we build houses for those in need of shelter.

Just like the cow, we are sometimes asked to go without.  Sharing meals with someone else when we could really use the leftovers, sending our “out-to-eat” money overseas so that a child in Tanzania can go to school for a year.

Just like the sheep, we are sometimes called to give up our comfort.  Standing outside in the freezing cold to ring the Salvation Army bell.  Staying awake all night to chaperone a youth lock-in even though we’d rather be home in our beds.

And just like the dove, we are all called to give Jesus our songs.  More than anything, he wants the love that fills our hearts to spill over and out in praise.   Whether it is actual music or not is beside the point.  He wants our hearts to sing.

So I was left wondering, “What am I called to sacrifice?  What am I called to give?” If throw up and car repairs and sidestepping toys all day long are what it takes to live this life of service and motherhood, then so be it.

It’s what Jesus is asking of me.  It’s my gift to give.

My little sister’s birthday is coming up this Wednesday, and our little brother’s birthday is the following Wednesday, so in their honor, I’d like to share a lovely story of our childhood.  They may debate the details of this story, but I am the oldest,  so I am right.  Don’t listen to them!  Also – do  not read any further if you have a weak stomach.

My brother, sister, and I were playing in the basement when we were probably around 10, 7, and 5.  Now my brother was the youngest.  He has grown into an awesome young man, he is probably one of the nicest guys you’ll ever meet, but he was (and maybe still is) a little strange/sensitive about certain things.  He HATED the idea of hair in his mouth.  No one likes it, but it was like he was allergic to it.  Of course my sister and I knew about his aversion.  We decided to see how much fun we could have with him.  We each pulled a strand of our  hair out, and were holding in our hands.  Edging closer and closer to our brother, we waved it around him making comments like, “Ewe, hair, look, we have hair in our hands,” and then my sister came out with, “Oh no, I dropped my hair, look Dan, it went in your mouth.”

I thought her comment was pretty funny.  How could a hair drop from her hand into his mouth without him trying to catch it?  Of course it didn’t go in his mouth, but the thought of it bothered him.  In fact, he was young enough that he believed it.  He began to stick his fingers in his mouth to try and retrieve the pretend hair.  No luck.  He started to gag over and over, until he finally vomitted.  Where did he vomit?  On my sister.

Now, as a child, my sister’s gag reflex was pretty strong, especially when it came to smells.  Maybe another time, I’ll write about an incident during low tide at the beach.  So, when my brother vomitted, you can guess what this caused my sister to do.  Yup.  Right back at you brother.  Did it end there?  Nope.  My brother again, and my sister again.  I stood there in astonishment that this could happen, but also kind of amused.  Neither moved, they just stood there, back and forth, and gagging when nothing else would come up.  Luckilly, I’ve always had a pretty strong stomach.  I ran upstairs, and between stiffled giggles, told my mom what was going on.  She was not amused like I thought she’d be.  Needless to say, we spent the next hour or so cleaning up the basement.  I felt I didn’t have as much ownership of the situation, so I stood behind a door and handed paper towels to my siblings as they needed them, while they actually did all of the cleaning.  Now some people who may or may not have been there at the time will tell you I probably had the most to do with it because I was egging my sister on and started all the fun in the first place.  Perhaps.  I was not a perfect kid.

There may be a point or a lesson behind this story, but I don’t think I’ll go there.  I’ll just enjoy another giggle, remembering the trouble I was.

I love Christmas with small children.  Probably my favorite part is that everything is new to them.  Everything seems magical.  They have no expectations.  They don’t have a list they’ve been thinking about.  Joe’s memory of Christmas last year is pretty cloudy.  He knows it’s Jesus’s birthday, that there’s a tree and some lights involved, but that’s it.  He’s pretty excited about it.  We decided to be very limited and frugal with gifts.  Each boy will only get 2 gifts and we’re going homemade.  Now, I’m not real talented with DIY projects.  I love easy, so if I can do it, you can do it.  We don’t have a great deal of money this year, and frankly we don’t want them to get to a point where they are expecting oodles of presents every Christmas.

So, here are some ideas I’ve gone through both for this Christmas and other occasions in creating gifts.  Hopefully you will find something your child may like as well.

1.  This toy was featured in a previous post.

2.  A photo album with pictures of loved ones or loved items, like this one from a previous post:

3.  Create an interactive visual to go along with a favorite song, such as 5 Little Monkeys, another previous post:

4.  My friend Kim painted wooden clothespins (not the spring kind) to look like people.  She has a whole family of people!

5.  Make a color sort game.  Paint stones different colors, and paint the inside of a cardboard egg carton those colors.  Child places stones in the correct pockets.

6.  Getting a new cell phone this Christmas?  Wrap up your old cell phone for your child!   (make sure the service is cancelled first!)

7.  Make a memory game by ordering double prints of your favorite pictures.

8.  Fill balloons with flour.

9.  Cardboard box house (and garage)

10.  Bean bags.

11.  Fishing game – Cut out different color fish, laminate, attach a paper clip to each mouth.  Attach a string to a stick and tie a magnet to the end.  I also use overhead projector markers to write numbers or letters on the fish after they’re laminated (you can wipe off and rewrite), so it is also a matching game.

12.  Play dough

13.  Musical Instruments:

14.  Felt boards

15.  Gather old keys, and put them on a safe ring for baby to play with.  (sanitize in boiling water first)

What are your ideas????

I drop my boys off in the babysitting room at the gym at least twice a week.  They like it there, but my older son is always asking about where I go and what I do.  I’ve shown him the room that I’m in, and he’s seen others in there exercising, but I think he’s not asking for security reasons anymore.  He wants in.

So this week, I’ll let him.  Tomorrow we put on “exercise clothes.”  We will crank up the tunes.  I will be the instructor, and I will show him what to do.  I know, it will really just be follow the leader, but to him it will be the real thing.  We’ll have exercise class just like I do in my “special” room at the gym.  Then, the fun will begin.  I will let him be the leader.  Ready for more fun?  13 month old baby brother will lead.  We won’t have a set time of when our class will be over.  I doubt we will be too tired to continue.  My guess is we’ll either stop because we’re laughing too hard, or someone is crying too hard.

Ever wonder where people get the feeling that exercise is a chore?  I know.  Some exercise is actually not fun.  I know this is a controversial statement, and try as you might, you won’t change my mind.  Some forms of exercise are boring and difficult, and plain non-fun.  When that’s what you’re exposed to, you start to get turned off to exercise in general.  I want my kids to think exercising is fun.  They won’t get that from just sitting in the babysitting room with no clue of what I am doing in the gym.  They won’t get that from a parent that takes them to the park and sits on the bench.  How are you teaching your kids that exercise is fun?